Cubwapwat Gutgud is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, competent dingo.

Cubwapwat Gutgud created a charm quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cubwapwat Gutgud, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cubwapwat Gutgud, he will destroy your home solar system.

Cubwapwat Gutgud's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Cubwapwat Gutgud's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of parsnips to seals while wearing blue skirts.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never feed peas to ants while wearing rings.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never tolerate songs in holy places.