Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, boastful armadillo.

Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap created Asia five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap, she will think nothing of it.

Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Bagwotcutcidfitlidhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never write about planets.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always help sick frogs.

5. Never sit in summer.