Zeddotgig is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, cheerful whale.

Zeddotgig created life four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zeddotgig, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zeddotgig, it will turn you into a hamster.

Zeddotgig's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Zeddotgig's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Zeddotgig in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never think about quantum field theory near moths while wearing violet dresses and balancing nine titanium spheres on your hands.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Do not gather at towers at midnight.

5. Always remove stockings before entering holy places.