Quartcabfeb is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, unthoughtful gerbil.

Quartcabfeb created a photon six million years ago.

If you believe in Quartcabfeb, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Quartcabfeb, it will cry a lot.

Quartcabfeb's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Quartcabfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of planets into wood.

2. Do not prepare bananas while filled with anger.

3. Never point your legs toward the south during prayer.

4. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never travel toward the east during summer.