Ganrowtad is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, contented jellyfish.

Ganrowtad created a strange quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ganrowtad, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Ganrowtad, he will torture you forever.

Ganrowtad's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Ganrowtad's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Do not speak about garlic.

4. Shun those given to greed.

5. Do not eat parsnips.