Spagcadzed is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unfair hamster.

Spagcadzed created the planet Earth seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagcadzed, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Spagcadzed, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Spagcadzed's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Spagcadzed's Holy Commandments

1. Never record names.

2. Always count to seven before sleeping.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching titanium.

5. Do not study chlorophyll on holy days.