Bomjoplarp is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, fussy narwhal.

Bomjoplarp created the planet Mars six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bomjoplarp, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bomjoplarp, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bomjoplarp's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Bomjoplarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about spacetime.

2. Always make sure there are no badgers in a building before entering it.

3. You must pray to Bomjoplarp eight times a day.

4. You must never eat peas.

5. Pray towards the east.