Hogsogpog is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, awesome goose.

Hogsogpog created the universe three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogsogpog, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Hogsogpog, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Hogsogpog's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Hogsogpog's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Run away from brown eagles, for they are unholy.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never think about gravity near mites while wearing purple ear rings and balancing six carbon spheres on your hands.