Pitkomort is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, duplicitous aardvark.

Pitkomort created water two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pitkomort, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Pitkomort, she will turn you into a goat.

Pitkomort's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Pitkomort's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always make sure there are no foxes in a room before entering it.

4. Do not sit in public.

5. Fast once a month.