Abvondub is a god.
It takes the form of a rotund, competent
chicken.
Abvondub created parasitic wasps eight billion years ago.
If you believe in
Abvondub, it will look favourably on your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Abvondub, it will torture you forever.
Abvondub's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.
Abvondub's Holy Commandments1. Never think about black holes.
2. Erect five nickel sculptures of Abvondub on top of important buildings.
3. Run away if four tapirs approach from the west.
4. Never talk about gravity near ducks while wearing red shoes and balancing nine silicon spheres on your back.
5. Never feed lemons to squirrels while wearing indigo dresses.