Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar is a god.

He takes the form of a large, temperamental finch.

Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar created Mount Everest seven million years ago.

If you believe in Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

2. Do not drink water in green rooms.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always help voles.

5. Erect a giant black sculpture of Jabnabkar Cussgudbodcar in the centre of the settlement.