Tiptapnell is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, ruthless monkey.

Tiptapnell created parasitic wasps nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tiptapnell, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tiptapnell, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Tiptapnell's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Tiptapnell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always wear white.

3. Never think about spacetime near great tits while wearing turquoise jumpers and balancing seven silicon spheres on your hands.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never laugh in the presence of ducks.