Cubwegnig Mongubdav is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, narcissistic centipede.

Cubwegnig Mongubdav created the universe four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubwegnig Mongubdav, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cubwegnig Mongubdav, it will turn you into a rock.

Cubwegnig Mongubdav's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Cubwegnig Mongubdav's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to four before sleeping.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Pray only in firelight.

5. Do not kill geese.