Fedmumbog is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, calm centipede.

Fedmumbog created a bottom quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedmumbog, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fedmumbog, it will destroy your favourite star.

Fedmumbog's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Fedmumbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near capybaras while wearing mauve tights and balancing eight titanium spheres on your head.

4. Retreat if four eagles approach from the north.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.