App is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, awesome dragon.

App created silver seven billion years ago.

If you believe in App, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in App, it will ignore you.

App's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

App's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three rats in a large pit.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not study cell theory on holy days.

4. Erect six lead sculptures of App on top of important buildings.

5. Never feed lots of oranges to ducks while wearing pink corsets.