Bemsafjip is a god.

He takes the form of a large, effective wombat.

Bemsafjip created a down quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bemsafjip, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bemsafjip, he will not care.

Bemsafjip's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Bemsafjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow sheep to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Never laugh in the presence of tapirs.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never adorn your back with white markings.

5. Always keep your back turned to the south at sunset.