Wipnelbonkrig is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, duplicitous donkey.

Wipnelbonkrig created oxygen six billion years ago.

If you believe in Wipnelbonkrig, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Wipnelbonkrig, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Wipnelbonkrig's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Wipnelbonkrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cucumbers to ducks while wearing violet shoes.

2. Do not eat gooseberries.

3. You must love Wipnelbonkrig.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Learn five new languages a year.