Betnullwot is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, self-confident turtle.

Betnullwot created the Sunflower Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betnullwot, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Betnullwot, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Betnullwot's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Betnullwot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear fawn clothing.

2. Never think about quantum mechanics near whales while wearing magenta dresses and balancing nine silicon spheres on your chest.

3. Always obey Betnullwot's priests.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Learn six new languages a year.