Gilkenhen Zenkinbud is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, smart otter.

Gilkenhen Zenkinbud created the Small Magellanic Cloud six million years ago.

If you believe in Gilkenhen Zenkinbud, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gilkenhen Zenkinbud, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Gilkenhen Zenkinbud's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Gilkenhen Zenkinbud's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

2. Always store grapes above ground.

3. Never proclaim while facing west.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not wear coats marked with mauve.