Flagpodster is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, all-knowing hippopotamus.

Flagpodster created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagpodster, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flagpodster, it will turn you into a hamster.

Flagpodster's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Flagpodster's Holy Commandments

1. Always keep your back turned to the south at sunset.

2. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not cook food in pots.