Geploopweg is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, grumpy cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Geploopweg created the Sombrero Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Geploopweg, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Geploopweg, it will destroy your home planet.

Geploopweg's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Geploopweg's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Put Geploopweg first in all things.

3. Hide from turquoise hamsters for they are unholy.

4. Never run in the presence of whales.

5. Never write about moons.