Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthoughtful parrot.

Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig created a bottom quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig, he will be mildly annoyed.

Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always look after injured otters.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Fubvengarfagcetton Bigcumhig in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never paint your head green.