Fenzimortran is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tiresome cow.

Fenzimortran created an atom seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fenzimortran, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fenzimortran, he will refuse to believe in you.

Fenzimortran's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Fenzimortran's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never write about quantum field theory.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never talk about nucleic acids.

5. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.