Wonjadban Vingubfet is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, selfish penguin.

Wonjadban Vingubfet created gold four million years ago.

If you believe in Wonjadban Vingubfet, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Wonjadban Vingubfet, he will curse you with boils.

Wonjadban Vingubfet's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Wonjadban Vingubfet's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry tortoises.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Wonjadban Vingubfet loves tapirs, so they must be respected.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Always treat doves with great respect.