Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, omnipotent snail.

Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit created the Sombrero Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear copper on your body.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. You must love Gepfablogtab Bidcissbit.

4. Always look after injured pigs.

5. Never bounce near birds.