Diddingarvog is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, irritating pig.

Diddingarvog created a charm quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Diddingarvog, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Diddingarvog, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Diddingarvog's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Diddingarvog's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from blue eagles for they are unholy.

2. Do not hurt swans.

3. Do not eat peas.

4. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Diddingarvog on top of all buildings.

5. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.