Femnarkik Rutappnur is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, witless jackal.

Femnarkik Rutappnur created the Small Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Femnarkik Rutappnur, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Femnarkik Rutappnur, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Femnarkik Rutappnur's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Femnarkik Rutappnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

3. Never allow shrews to witness sacred rites.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Never cross crossroads at dawn.