Bamappflan is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, witty dingo.

Bamappflan created the Tadpole Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamappflan, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bamappflan, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Bamappflan's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Bamappflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle silicon while unclean.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching copper.

4. Do not keep four seals in a large pit.

5. Never gather eight goats in one place.