Bidkanbog is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, moody manatee.

Bidkanbog created a top quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bidkanbog, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bidkanbog, she will turn you into a mole.

Bidkanbog's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Bidkanbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never feed lentils to horses while wearing stockings.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.

5. Never think about gravity near grasshopers while wearing yellow ear rings and balancing nine silicon spheres on your legs.