Ripkimfem is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, benevolent finch.

Ripkimfem created an up quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ripkimfem, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ripkimfem, it will laugh at you.

Ripkimfem's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Ripkimfem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate quantum field theory during the night.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.

5. Never talk about great tits.