Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, two-faced meerkat.

Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat created the Whirlpool Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Flatstik Rulvedminbossbat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help gulls.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always look after injured ants.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.