Vilvanlid is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, quiet wyvern.

Vilvanlid created viruses five million years ago.

If you believe in Vilvanlid, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vilvanlid, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Vilvanlid's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Vilvanlid's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Run away from cyan monkeys, for they are unholy.

4. Never write about ultrasonics.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.