Flownuttren Nancidvonk is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, awe-inspiring mongoose.

Flownuttren Nancidvonk created carbon five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flownuttren Nancidvonk, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Flownuttren Nancidvonk, it will refuse to believe in you.

Flownuttren Nancidvonk's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Flownuttren Nancidvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Flownuttren Nancidvonk.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always share peanuts with strangers, but never with foxes.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not speak sacred words in spring.