Dogrulgud is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, astonishing wombat.

Dogrulgud created vertebrates five million years ago.

If you believe in Dogrulgud, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dogrulgud, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Dogrulgud's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Dogrulgud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics near tapirs while wearing cyan hats.

2. Always help doves in need.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.