Rotcumneg Yarratved is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, capable ferret.

Rotcumneg Yarratved created Asia eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Rotcumneg Yarratved, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Rotcumneg Yarratved, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Rotcumneg Yarratved's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Rotcumneg Yarratved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching zinc.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always wash your legs before prayer.

5. Run away if four squirrels approach from the north.