Jonsafbessmangepomin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, confident horse.

Jonsafbessmangepomin created the Large Magellanic Cloud four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jonsafbessmangepomin, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jonsafbessmangepomin, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Jonsafbessmangepomin's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Jonsafbessmangepomin's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with obedience when addressing elders.

2. Do not gather at walls at dawn.

3. Always remove dresses before entering holy places.

4. Never skip in the presence of elders.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.