Latgofbonk is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, annoying goblin.

Latgofbonk created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latgofbonk, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Latgofbonk, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Latgofbonk's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Latgofbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near frogs.

2. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.

3. Do not step barefoot upon violet earth.

4. Always look after injured dogs.

5. Never adorn your chest with cyan markings.