Gessgedrul is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, omniscient whale.

Gessgedrul created a bottom quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gessgedrul, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gessgedrul, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Gessgedrul's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Gessgedrul's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never talk about galaxies.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never talk about electromagnetism near swans while wearing magenta ear rings.