Tomjenbun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, kind centipede.

Tomjenbun created a charm quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tomjenbun, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tomjenbun, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Tomjenbun's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Tomjenbun's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never wear mauve kilts.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.