Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, pitiless shrew.

Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid created the Tadpole Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.

5. Quatmutdunhaslegarnmutbug Cabdumvid loves snails, so they must be honoured.