Nillbassqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, boastful shrew.

Nillbassqueeg created the universe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Nillbassqueeg, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Nillbassqueeg, he will be very unhappy.

Nillbassqueeg's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Nillbassqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not speak about peanuts.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.