Lapgadcim is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witty walrus.

Lapgadcim created energy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lapgadcim, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Lapgadcim, it will turn you into a mouse.

Lapgadcim's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Lapgadcim's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak the names of planets aloud.

2. Never record names.

3. Never write about chromosomes.

4. You must love Lapgadcim.

5. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.