Guppangfet is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, annoying warg.

Guppangfet created the cosmos six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Guppangfet, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Guppangfet, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Guppangfet's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Guppangfet's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Guppangfet on top of all buildings.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never talk about spacetime near doves while wearing indigo shorts.