Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, unfair manatee.

Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam created the Large Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam's Holy Commandments

1. Tapcab Bigrowbugbodquam loves pigs, so they must be respected.

2. Never sprint in the presence of swans.

3. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

4. Never sing near dogs.

5. Fast once a month.