Pinvabloop Armvagstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, charitable cat.

Pinvabloop Armvagstaf created the planet Venus nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pinvabloop Armvagstaf, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pinvabloop Armvagstaf, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Pinvabloop Armvagstaf's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Pinvabloop Armvagstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Feed all hungry snakes.

5. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.