Nakcarkartif is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, irritating toad.

Nakcarkartif created snails six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nakcarkartif, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nakcarkartif, she will turn you into a mole.

Nakcarkartif's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Nakcarkartif's Holy Commandments

1. Monkeys are not to be trusted.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Always help eagles in need.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never talk about nebulae.