Jabmobfob is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, deceitful beaver.

Jabmobfob created the planet Venus six billion years ago.

If you believe in Jabmobfob, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Jabmobfob, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Jabmobfob's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Jabmobfob's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not eat spinach.

3. Never discuss cell theory in public assemblies.

4. Never feed wheat to seals while wearing magenta kilts.

5. Never write about chromosomes.