Pangjarnged is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, wise capybara.

Pangjarnged created the planet Venus three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pangjarnged, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Pangjarnged, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Pangjarnged's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Pangjarnged's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics near horses while wearing orange skirts and balancing eight tin spheres on your neck.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect five gold sculptures of Pangjarnged on top of important buildings.

4. You must pray to Pangjarnged nine times a day.

5. Do not eat beans.