Wodbonksag is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, moody gorilla.

Wodbonksag created humankind seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wodbonksag, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wodbonksag, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Wodbonksag's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Wodbonksag's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention swans.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

3. Do not speak about peas.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never eat bark.