Tikstiklat is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, dishonourable otter.

Tikstiklat created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tikstiklat, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tikstiklat, she will turn you into a snail.

Tikstiklat's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Tikstiklat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near shrews while wearing red corsets and balancing eight platinum spheres on your feet.

2. Do not speak about coconuts.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Pray towards the north.